The Asylum has over a hundred movies and all genres are covered so you shouldn’t have any problem finding one to watch no matter how you feel.
I conducted some experiments with drinking, smoking, intentionally being put in the doghouse, tried picking up girls in a bar (not easy for this out of shape balding guy), and loaded up on depressants all to find out which Asylum films are best depending on your mood.
Here are the results:
Buzzed – Mega Shark vs Crocosaurus (you have two beasts to root for)
Depressed – 2012 Doomsday (you’ll realize life isn’t so bad)
Stoned – Jane White is Sick and Twisted (The title says it all…also great drunk)
Bored – The Da Vinci Treasure (keeps you attentive)
In the doghouse – MILF (she’ll find someone younger if you don’t apologize)
Husband’s a bastard – Born Bad (mainly because it was on Lifetime)
Dirty old man – Barely Legal (obviously)
Drunk – 2012 Ice Age (a glacier destroying everything in its path, fun ride!)
Douche Bag – Street Racer (you’ll picture yourself in it)
Queen Douche – Almighty Thor (Cody was a Chippendale)
Angry – 2 Headed Shark Attack (watching a shark devour the characters is therapeutic)
Paranoid – 11/11/11 (everyone is after a kid, takes the pressure off you)
I can add more to the list, but while in detox and nursing my spousal injuries I’ll be watching movies sober and in pain for a while. For the record if I actually tried to pick up a girl in a bar it would be difficult to post this from six feet under.